Reflection
WOW! The last few months have been a blur. Thus, my reason for not writing. I simply haven't had the time. So just to catch you up:
In September, I started the Fall 2011 semester, moved to a new apartment (same building just different floor), got a new job, and went to a wedding. In October, I was working my new job and helping out my old job because it was busy and I didn't want to leave them stranded (yeah, i know I am too nice - but that's me), all while trying to handle three classes. In November, aside from school, work, and Thanksgiving I decided that my life needed more action so I got into a little accident. Yep, I'm brilliant, what can I say? LOL So needless to say I haven't had much time for writing.
Since, the year is almost through, I began reflecting on 2011. I must say this has been a tough year. I can't say it has been a good year, there have been moments that have been good, but nothing spectacular. My family lost someone special back in March. Someone we really just got back into our lives; someone who we loved and cherished dearly. I call him my nephew. I call him Chris. I still have trouble accepting that he isn't here. There are times where I just stare at his picture and think this absolutely must be a dream. I look at his beautiful kids and feel immense saddness that they will never know him. I feel anger that I never got to really know him. There are so many different levels of emotions (or the lack thereof) that it's hard to list them all.
On a different note, I had an article published. It was part of a class assignment in the spring and I stuggled with it. I didn't think it would be published. This was around the same time that Chris died and I had no motivation to do anything. I ended up writing the article in one afternoon while at work and I tweaked it over the weekend and then it was published. Writing that article actually helped me a little with Chris' sudden passing. I was able to connect my emotions to the artist I was writing about and her artwork. I can post the link to the blog if you are interested in reading it.
So, as I look back over the year and the challenges that have come my way I have to remind myself that I must count my blessings. Yes, it is indeed hard when you lose someone that you love, but it isn't impossible. I should be thankful that I have a job and an apartment. I should be greatful that in spite of how hard the spring semester was, I managed to get Straight A's. I love my family and friends and I am so blessed to have them in my life. I wouldn't be who I am without them. I am thankful for so many things that I woud be here forever naming them.
The point is that you can always - ALWAYS - find something to be thankful for. Stop looking at the glass as half empty and see it as full. As tough as this year has been for me I can't thank God enough for all he has done. If you say, "Leigh Ann, how can you thank God when your nephew died?" I would have to respond, well I know he is in Heaven. And, Chris' fiance' and children survived the accident. I am thankful for that. The life we live will be the legacy we leave. I want you to know that I want my legacy to be full of compassion and always optimistic even when faced with immense tragedy. I will never stop believing that God has a plan and a purpose for not only my life but everyone I know. Whether you want to believe it or not you are special and wonderfully made. God makes no mistakes and he loves you more than anyone here on earth could ever love you. He knew you before you were ever in your mother's womb and he had a plan. We may spend our entire lives trying to figure out what that is, but if we will just believe God will do amazing things.
Yes, this year was hard - beyond words. However, it is comforting to me to know that God knows what I am going through. There is nothing that I will experience in this life that God didn't already experience. He knows every tear and every pain. He knows our faults and shortcomings. Yet, he looks past all of it to show us just how much he loves us. Because of these few reasons alone, I trust him. I hope that you will know it too. I will look at 2012 with confidence that God will bring me to and through anything. There isn't anything in this life that is too hard for God.
Here is my article as published in the Baltimore Journal - Radar Redux
In September, I started the Fall 2011 semester, moved to a new apartment (same building just different floor), got a new job, and went to a wedding. In October, I was working my new job and helping out my old job because it was busy and I didn't want to leave them stranded (yeah, i know I am too nice - but that's me), all while trying to handle three classes. In November, aside from school, work, and Thanksgiving I decided that my life needed more action so I got into a little accident. Yep, I'm brilliant, what can I say? LOL So needless to say I haven't had much time for writing.
Since, the year is almost through, I began reflecting on 2011. I must say this has been a tough year. I can't say it has been a good year, there have been moments that have been good, but nothing spectacular. My family lost someone special back in March. Someone we really just got back into our lives; someone who we loved and cherished dearly. I call him my nephew. I call him Chris. I still have trouble accepting that he isn't here. There are times where I just stare at his picture and think this absolutely must be a dream. I look at his beautiful kids and feel immense saddness that they will never know him. I feel anger that I never got to really know him. There are so many different levels of emotions (or the lack thereof) that it's hard to list them all.
On a different note, I had an article published. It was part of a class assignment in the spring and I stuggled with it. I didn't think it would be published. This was around the same time that Chris died and I had no motivation to do anything. I ended up writing the article in one afternoon while at work and I tweaked it over the weekend and then it was published. Writing that article actually helped me a little with Chris' sudden passing. I was able to connect my emotions to the artist I was writing about and her artwork. I can post the link to the blog if you are interested in reading it.
So, as I look back over the year and the challenges that have come my way I have to remind myself that I must count my blessings. Yes, it is indeed hard when you lose someone that you love, but it isn't impossible. I should be thankful that I have a job and an apartment. I should be greatful that in spite of how hard the spring semester was, I managed to get Straight A's. I love my family and friends and I am so blessed to have them in my life. I wouldn't be who I am without them. I am thankful for so many things that I woud be here forever naming them.
The point is that you can always - ALWAYS - find something to be thankful for. Stop looking at the glass as half empty and see it as full. As tough as this year has been for me I can't thank God enough for all he has done. If you say, "Leigh Ann, how can you thank God when your nephew died?" I would have to respond, well I know he is in Heaven. And, Chris' fiance' and children survived the accident. I am thankful for that. The life we live will be the legacy we leave. I want you to know that I want my legacy to be full of compassion and always optimistic even when faced with immense tragedy. I will never stop believing that God has a plan and a purpose for not only my life but everyone I know. Whether you want to believe it or not you are special and wonderfully made. God makes no mistakes and he loves you more than anyone here on earth could ever love you. He knew you before you were ever in your mother's womb and he had a plan. We may spend our entire lives trying to figure out what that is, but if we will just believe God will do amazing things.
Yes, this year was hard - beyond words. However, it is comforting to me to know that God knows what I am going through. There is nothing that I will experience in this life that God didn't already experience. He knows every tear and every pain. He knows our faults and shortcomings. Yet, he looks past all of it to show us just how much he loves us. Because of these few reasons alone, I trust him. I hope that you will know it too. I will look at 2012 with confidence that God will bring me to and through anything. There isn't anything in this life that is too hard for God.
Here is my article as published in the Baltimore Journal - Radar Redux
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