How To Deal With Disappointment
I have been going to college (while working full time) since 2007, studying American Sign Language (ASL) in hopes of one day to become an interpreter. When I decided to go to college, move away from friends and family, and study this beautiful language, I had NO IDEA how tough it was really going to be. I don't know how other adults(30+) with families and children manage work, school, homework, soccer games, date nightes with the spouses, etc do it. I am a single girl living on my own. I have work and I have school. It really should not be this complicated. However, it is complicated and I have to deal with it all including not meeting my own expectations.
I just finished my finals for the Spring 2012 semester and I thought that I did all of them well. Thanks to technology, I don't have to wait too long to get my results. Well, as unfortunate as it is, I did not do so well on one very important class; a class that I needed to get a B in to move to the next round of classes. Reflecting back, I thought I did well in the class. I maintained a B average and it was a class that I enjoyed going to. I thought my instructor was good and I feel that I learned from her. But as confident as I felt in this class it didn't prepare me for the shock I felt when I received my final grade - 77.59%. Immediately, I thought this was some sort of mistake. I was doing well so how could this have happened. I also had done some extra credit, but after emailing my instructor the extra credit didn't count as much as I thought it would. I pretty much tanked my final.
I'm not going to lie, I was and am extremely disappointed. As much as I would LOVE to blame my instuctor or anyone else for my failure, I am more disappointed in myself than anything. I felt like I gave it my all, that I tried my best and worked hard. I did the homework, I practiced, and I asked questions. Still, it wasn't enough. I wasn't enough.
There is a quote by Charles Swindoll: Life is 10% of what happens to you and 90% is how react to it. Hmm, so true. I could get angry, sulk, complain and if I really had an attitude, I would quit. Really, what good what it do? If I did that, then I really would be a disappointment - to myself and to others.
One of the things that I like about myself is that I believe to have a resilient personality. I can bounce back after disappointment. Yes, I am disappointed, but it is what it is and I can't change it. The best thing to do is to get back up and try again. I feel like I have been in school for a million years and I think sometimes that it should not be this hard, but everything happens for a reason. The key is to recognize when you need to learn something important and figure out how to do it. So I'm going to take a good look at myself and see what needs to be done. What do I need to do to do better?
I don't know how many people read my blog - if anyone. This is pretty theraputic for me and it allows me to get my feelings out. But I want to challenge you too. Maybe you are going through something too. Maybe life has handed you some pretty rotten hands and there seems to be no end in sight. Consider this a learning opportunity. Instead of asking, "Why me?" ask, "What can I do to be better?" It could be anything from taking a class to better your job or pay to changing your attitude. It is up to you, but don't allow your circumstances dictate your entire life.
Attitude is very important. If you have a bad attitude you will have a bad reaction. If you have a bad reaction you will complain. If you complain you will see the whole process as negative. If you look at the whole situation as negative then... Well, do you see a pattern?
What good would it do me if I had a bad attitude? Where would it get me? I choose to see the good in this. I am learning from some of the best interpreters in the field. It isn't that she wants me to fail. It's quite the opposite; she wants me to succeed and do well. So in essence, if that means I need to take the class again then so be it. I'm not exactly thrilled with repeating a class but maybe it is what I need to be a better interpreter. I am at a point in college where this is where it counts the most. This is the foundation to be a good and effective interpreter. I want to get it right and do well and be a good interpreter.
I feel like I have been here forever, but who said this was going to be quick and painless?? The things in life that are the most tough are the very things that we need to learn from, take notes, and grow. I refuse to let this dictate my college career or my attitude. I now know what to expect in this class and I will be prepared for the fall. So, it is Ok to be disappointed, but let it serve as a motivator to push you and propel you into the person you were always meant to be.
And we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them.
Romans 8:28 (NLT)
I just finished my finals for the Spring 2012 semester and I thought that I did all of them well. Thanks to technology, I don't have to wait too long to get my results. Well, as unfortunate as it is, I did not do so well on one very important class; a class that I needed to get a B in to move to the next round of classes. Reflecting back, I thought I did well in the class. I maintained a B average and it was a class that I enjoyed going to. I thought my instructor was good and I feel that I learned from her. But as confident as I felt in this class it didn't prepare me for the shock I felt when I received my final grade - 77.59%. Immediately, I thought this was some sort of mistake. I was doing well so how could this have happened. I also had done some extra credit, but after emailing my instructor the extra credit didn't count as much as I thought it would. I pretty much tanked my final.
I'm not going to lie, I was and am extremely disappointed. As much as I would LOVE to blame my instuctor or anyone else for my failure, I am more disappointed in myself than anything. I felt like I gave it my all, that I tried my best and worked hard. I did the homework, I practiced, and I asked questions. Still, it wasn't enough. I wasn't enough.
There is a quote by Charles Swindoll: Life is 10% of what happens to you and 90% is how react to it. Hmm, so true. I could get angry, sulk, complain and if I really had an attitude, I would quit. Really, what good what it do? If I did that, then I really would be a disappointment - to myself and to others.
One of the things that I like about myself is that I believe to have a resilient personality. I can bounce back after disappointment. Yes, I am disappointed, but it is what it is and I can't change it. The best thing to do is to get back up and try again. I feel like I have been in school for a million years and I think sometimes that it should not be this hard, but everything happens for a reason. The key is to recognize when you need to learn something important and figure out how to do it. So I'm going to take a good look at myself and see what needs to be done. What do I need to do to do better?
I don't know how many people read my blog - if anyone. This is pretty theraputic for me and it allows me to get my feelings out. But I want to challenge you too. Maybe you are going through something too. Maybe life has handed you some pretty rotten hands and there seems to be no end in sight. Consider this a learning opportunity. Instead of asking, "Why me?" ask, "What can I do to be better?" It could be anything from taking a class to better your job or pay to changing your attitude. It is up to you, but don't allow your circumstances dictate your entire life.
Attitude is very important. If you have a bad attitude you will have a bad reaction. If you have a bad reaction you will complain. If you complain you will see the whole process as negative. If you look at the whole situation as negative then... Well, do you see a pattern?
What good would it do me if I had a bad attitude? Where would it get me? I choose to see the good in this. I am learning from some of the best interpreters in the field. It isn't that she wants me to fail. It's quite the opposite; she wants me to succeed and do well. So in essence, if that means I need to take the class again then so be it. I'm not exactly thrilled with repeating a class but maybe it is what I need to be a better interpreter. I am at a point in college where this is where it counts the most. This is the foundation to be a good and effective interpreter. I want to get it right and do well and be a good interpreter.
I feel like I have been here forever, but who said this was going to be quick and painless?? The things in life that are the most tough are the very things that we need to learn from, take notes, and grow. I refuse to let this dictate my college career or my attitude. I now know what to expect in this class and I will be prepared for the fall. So, it is Ok to be disappointed, but let it serve as a motivator to push you and propel you into the person you were always meant to be.
And we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them.
Romans 8:28 (NLT)
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ReplyDeleteLeigh
ReplyDeleteI am sorry about that and also sorry that my comment is too late. I completely understand how it feels. Last year, I had a mathematics class that I thought I would fail because I only had a D grade before finals. I was so disappointed and felt like giving up. I took the finals and with the God's grace, I was able to pass that class with a B grade. However, there were other classes that I thought I did better but turned out that I did not. I was very disappointed about the grades but at least I passed them.
Test does not always show the hard work, the capability and intelligent of a person. It only gives a clue about where you are. So do not think that you are not good enough. It was just unlucky time.
it is not easy to master in sign language specially when you want to become interpreter. I remember my experience in learning ASL; The lowest grade that I got for a class in college was a sign language class.
I like how you keep positive and strong and is one thing I like reading about your blog. Stay strong, you can do it!!!
p.s: yes people do read you blog, you see I did :)